My depression/anxiety

I got bullied in school quite a bit before I moved school and a little bit after I moved school and that led me to depression. None of my family knew which made it worse, my little sister would just tell me to "stop being so depressing" and I just used to hide away in my room. I think my parents being at work quite a lot helped me hide it from them. I started to cut as a way to let out all my emotions. In year 8/9 I had a councillor but he couldn't help me with anything because I refused to open up to him, now that I am getting better I do regret that a lot because I'm pretty sure I could've gotten better a lot sooner if I did open you to him. In the third month of year 9 I got told I didn't have to see him anymore because he had signed me off as "emotionally unstable" and I wasn't happy about that. Almost a year after that my school find out I cut, we had to go swimming on camp, I ended up getting sent home from camp half way through. My dad kept shouting at me about it and my mom took me shopping. This didn't help though, I only stopped cutting a month and 3 weeks(ish) ago because that's when I found really great people on YouTube :-) and it's made me want to do my own YouTube videos one day but I have no idea what to do them about :-( I was still very depressed until I stopped cutting, my mom bought me and herself a dog each, Phoebe, her dog and Lola, my dog. I do love my dogs and I'm greatful for having them because I know not everybody is aloud dogs so it was nice to be able to have one which I let my friend call hers as well. But dogs DO NOT cure depression, I fact it made me more depressed because you have to look after them and walk them and things like that. I struggled to get out of bed and get ready for school myself and then in a morning having to walk a dog as well it honestly killed me I was late to school a lot and my parents ended up saying I wasn't aloud to do it, I do admit that made me happy because then I wouldn't be late for school. I hate being late especially if your class has already started learning because everybody looks at you. I have slight anxiety issues. Me and my sister once went to the white rose, if you don't know what that is it's a shopping centre which is actually really small compared to other shopping centres but I had an anxiety attack in the middle of it, I couldn't concentrate and I was crying and I felt really dizzy and my older sister was just like "you look genuinely scared what's going on?" And I just said nothing I just don't like being around this many people and she said that she could go shopping another day so we got to leave and I was really happy about that. I'm fortunate to go to quite a small school so I don't really feel anxiety their I think there's like 500 kids in the whole upper school. When I first joined the school I knew three people and two of them, being boys, didn't like me but I had one friend who I've known since I first started primary school in year 1. (I was late joining primary school because I had family issues being that I didn't have a family so I didn't go to preschool, I went to nursery and just under a term of reception but after that I dropped out of school for around a year. Then when I was five I started living with my auntie and uncle, which I still do and I go to school properly now) When I first joined the new school I was assigned a friend to show me around which meant I had two friends and I was quite happy about that. My friend who I've known forever actually doesn't like me anymore because the friend I got assigned I got on really well with and now were best friends instead of me being best friends with her even though she already had a best friend so i don't know why she doesn't like me tbh. My best friend could tell that I was sad though, she then found out about me not having a prepped family and everything and she thought that that could be one of the reasons I was sat and hurting myself so after having a few talks with her about things which upset us we realised we had quite similar problems and we helped each other get through them. If you are depressed please tell a good friend because they will help you and you never know what their life is like! I thought if I told someone they would bully me and once school and everyone in it found out I cut they did bully me but it was fine because I had a few good friends who stayed by my side and I'm so greatful for them. When I first joined the school there were some girls who didn't like me because all the boys thought I was "hot" and they were all giving me more attention than them so they kept saying nasty things about me and made everybody at my new school not like me appart from my assigned friend, I then met her friend group and now were all really good friends. The problem with me is that I didn't tell anyone about being sad and the things on my phone/iPad were all about not being good enough and I believed I wasn't good enough. When people we're mean to me and they pushed me about a lot I didn't tell anybody, I thought nobody would care but I've learnt that they do, ask to talk to your parents or a teacher if you're too scared to talk to your parents but do talk to somebody and if you are dealing with anxiety do not stay at home locked away from everybody else, I know it's hard but I kept away from everybody and it makes your friends drift away from you and you don't want that, even if it's just going to the local park with a few friends do it.